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| Vol. 6, No. 5 | October-November 2000 Archive edition | © Media Synergy, Inc. |
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(MEDFORD, MA) - Scientists digging for ancient relics along the banks of the Mystic Lakes uncovered a living legend believed to be half a century old! Scientists hired by the Medford Boat Club say that Commodore-for-life John H. Sheehan has been preserved for 50 years by the salt water flowing in from Boston Harbor. "He was amazingly preserved. The old geezer must have been pickled for years," said a scientist who asked for anonymity. "We found him sitting on his boat like he had been there for a hundred years." Scientists said the man, who turns 50 Oct. 28, had kept in shape playing hockey and baseball and by driving his five kids all over town for sports and school events. He was reported to be married about half of his life to a woman who was a superb cook. The Sheehan World has learned that John H. Sheehan also had a lifelong interest in boats and has spent many years on sailboats and other watercraft in Boston Harbor and surrounding waters. Bystanders at the lake reported that scientists propped up Sheehan on the back deck of a boat, Shiver Me Timbers. He immediately reached for a beer bottle, guzzled it down and promptly fell overboard. This gave the scientists a clue about what this ancient artifact might have been pickled in all these years. "We're going to start soaking all of our ancient fossils in beer," one scientist quipped. |
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Captain for hire
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